I currently stay with my husband, his siblings and cousins. All of them are boys except one. All of them younger than my husband and I, but are grown-ups. My parents-in-law stay abroad. So it is less of a home and more of a hostel, where Az and I are joint-wardens.
When I fall sick or feel unwell, I usually stay in bed. I mostly sleep through it as it reduces my discomfort. And the one thing I crave in my marital home is some care. My husband is away at work the whole day, and the others at home hardly notice that I am missing in action.
Back home, when anyone is sick, that one person is the centre of attention. From time to time, he/she would be asked how he/she is feeling, asked if they need anything, water/juice/food would be provided in bed timely without being asked. In short, you are thoroughly pampered. Even Deta, who is not good at taking care of even himself, would come and check on us from time to time.
Given that background, I find it absolutely saddening when none of the house members check on me while I am sick. I stay in my room the entire time, only making trips to the kitchen to get water and food. I even cook for everyone most of the times. It surprises me that it doesn’t even crosses anyone’s mind that I might be needing medicine or at least some water. Isn’t being taken care of during illness the greatest plus of not staying alone? When somebody else is sick at home, Az and I take care in the smallest of things. I always believed “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”, but the world hardly reciprocates.
I try to analyze why it is so. Is it because they are males that they haven’t been programmed to be caring? Is it by living in the company of brothers, the sister too has become like them? Do people are of inherent caring nature or do they learn from people around them? Or is it because I am the official caretaker, I don’t need care myself? Or am I overreacting now? These questions plague me whenever I don’t feel well here. Now I am waiting for Az to be home so that I get some pampering finally.